Answer:  Not at all!  I find that most prospective adoptive parents fear that their adoption attorney is going to tell them that they are too old to adopt.  In domestic adoption, the birth parents select the adoptive parent(s) who they want to adopt the baby.  Because it is the birth parents who make that decision, the State does not interfere by imposing any maximum age restrictions.  Simply put, there is no maximum age restriciton in domestic adoption.  With respect to your specific ages, you'll be happy to know that you fall within the average age range for prospective adoptive parents.  Indeed, most prospective adoptive parents are between 35 and 55 years of age and we have seen both younger and older cleints who have successfully adopted. 

Answer: No. Don’t ever let anyone impose their set of beliefs about how your adoption should be planned. There is nothing more personal then selecting a family to adopt your child and creating an adoption plan. In our program, you can pursue any type of adoption you would like. Many birth mothers love to speak with a counselor regularly during and after the placement and many birth mothers do not wish to have any counseling at all. This decision is completely up to you as we have no counseling requirements. With respect to contact, we can help you pursue any level of contact you wish. We find that adoptive families span from wanting a very closed to very open adoptions. No matter what your wish is with respect to contact, there will be wonderful families wanting the exact same type of adoption plan you seek. Remember to make sure that any adoption professional you consider respects your wishes and fully understands the type of adoption plan that is right for you.

Answer: No. While being concerned with bonding is often a concern of a prospective adoptive parent(s) who are beginning to explore adoption, those that pursue adoption and have a baby through the process always report that bonding starts to take place as soon as the adoptive parents hold the baby and are given the responsibility of caring for the baby. In domestic adoption, the adoptive parents are usually in the delivery room and start to care for the baby the instant the baby is born. The awesome responsibility of parenting a newborn child instantly takes over. As one client once put it, "the second you see and hold the baby that was meant to be, bonding is instant and your life is forever changed."

In a majority of states, the answer is yes. Most states allow for an adoptive parent to pay for a birth mother’s basic living expenses for the last trimester of the pregnancy and two to eight weeks after the birth of the baby. Living expenses have to be necessary and reasonable and usually cover rent, utilities, food, transportation and maternity clothes. The law permits this because a birth mother in her last trimester of pregnancy is not likely able to work and therefore is considered to be temporarily “disabled.” During this period of disability, most states permit an adoptive couple to cover basic living expenses so long as they are not contingent on the placement. We find that nearly all adoptive parents very much want to provide this assistance. In our program, assuming state law permits support for living expenses, we will set up a birth mother trust account and handle all disbursements so that you do not ever have to discuss issues of expenses with the adoptive parent(s) you select. In addition to living expenses, nearly every state allows for the adoptive parent(s) to cover the costs any counseling, attorneys’ fees and medical expenses.

Answer: While the adoption is pending, your son will use his original birth certificate (issued immediately after the birth of the child). Your adoption petition and the birth parent consent forms prove you are the prospective adoptive parents and contain the name you gave your son. You should use your son’s new name for all purposes going forward. While the Social Security Administration can issue a social security number for your son while the adoption is pending, it is best to wait until the adoption is completed. I recommend that you wait to apply because you want to apply in the name you give your son and as your son's parents. This is proven by the new birth certificate that you will receive after you finalize the adoption. If you want to claim your child for tax purposes while the adoption is still pending, you can download Form W-7A from the Internal Revenue Service. They will issue you an Adoption Taxpayer Identification Number ("ATIN"). This identification number is specifically for a child whose adoption is not yet finalized. Please remember to consult with your tax advisor regarding your particular tax situation. Once your son's adoption is finalized, the Court and/or adoption agency will automatically request that the state in which the baby was born issue a new birth certificate that lists you as the parents of the child. The new birth certificate also will reflect whatever name you have given your son. Upon receiving the new birth certificate, (this can take a few days to a year depending on the state) you should go online to the Social Security Administration and apply for a social security number for your child.